One day you learn to trust yourself
Or how to style your hair
Or to be clear about your needs
You learn to write
To tell which is your right hand and which is your left
To speak a language
To go after a dream
To love someone
To change your style
To be the new student/worker/resident
To speak to audiences
To play an instrument
To play a sport
To take a risk
To let go of something
To let in something
To solve an equation
To be hurt without it affecting your self worth
To befriend your pain, enter the darkness, trust the process and come out transformed
To not be so hard on yourself
To share your work with others
To make new friends
To adapt to a different culture
To use a map
To change your mind
To change your plans
To forgive someone
To forgive yourself
To start over
Have you ever tried any of these things? I remember trying each of them for the first couple of times and how I thought they were the end of the world. They were weird for a while, embarrassing, lonely, frustrating. Then they got only a little better, but were still mostly hard. Then one day they weren’t so hard anymore. One day even if I was scared to try each one it didn’t paralyze me any more. One day even if it was hard I knew I could do it because I had done it before. I had been through the roller coaster before.
I had integrated these acts into my self-concept, I had developed the skills to cope with them, learnt a few tricks to do them better next time and one day I knew these big challenges might shake me, but not so much as to completely floor me.
So it makes one question what it means for something to be hard. Surely you have done many hard things and forgotten they were hard. For example, you didn’t speak English from the womb. You learnt it at some point. You didn’t always write or read or type, did you? And so many other things. You probably awkwardly edged your way into the attributes you now consider natural, comfortable, authentically you.
You’ve come a long way, and you can do it again. It will be hard again, the struggle will be real again, you may cry again, and then it will become easy.